Sending the wrong signals to a toddler

I have always asked my two-year old daughter to do some errands for me and she always seemed enthusiastic to do them. She would do it to please me so I thought. Fetching a glass of water was her favourite. She would rush to get back to me sometimes spilling the water in the process. I would melt inside with happiness and satisfaction knowing that one day she will get it right. This loyalty was to turn into shattering experience.

But this time she refused to get some water for me. I was shocked and impressed at the same time.
Shocked because it was the first time she had said no. I was instantly thrown into an epistemological crisis but simultaneously impressed because I thought something strong was beginning to express itself in her. I did not see this action as disobedience or the start of it or that she had learnt that type of behaviour from someone. I could now see it was time for negotiation in our relationship but who would do that with a two-year old?

I hugged her to show my love for the strong character that I thought was beginning to take control and she was confused. She just stood there and then walked away so I thought to get the water.
In those fleeting moments something hit me hard. I had shown a weakness. How was she going to take the hugging. A reward for disobedience. Would she do that again to get hugged. What signals were I sending to her. I disappeared from the scene for I did want her to come back with the water if she were to. I had killed it. How could I let her get away with that. My brain was in a turmoil. Walking away was even worse. What had happened to my rationality? A real crisis. What could I have done?

2 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. sunnydelyte21
    Apr 26, 2011 @ 22:27:05

    Next time hold your ground. It happens to us all at one point in time.


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