Who is the better parent?

We would go to parties and wished we had never went. He would bully the other kids. Never wanted anyone to touch his toys. Every parent would complain and most of the time we would find an excuse to leave early. Our friends would say our son was a brat and was spoiled and that we were failing to bring him up right. This was painful and we would reluctantly reassure ourselves that there was nothing wrong with our son. We could get lots of signals, most of them eye-contact and in the end we had to look down in shame.

For his crèche, we had the same comments and at one stage the woman in charge asked us if we could take our kid somewhere else where people of color could interact. We wanted to give our kid a head start in education and were convinced that no racial slurs would stop us.

The racial slurring lady soon had a working partner. A white lady who did not see my son’s behavior as a product of his skin colour. This was the turning point in my son’s life. The lady to which I shall not mention her name to avoid embarrassing her was great and provided my son with everything he wanted. My son started to have self belief and ever since has been a shining light.

To our excitement in grade O he was also able to connect with another teacher a Mrs Knight who was a knight to him. My son would do anything to please her but there she was; leading him to greatness, into a great orator, into a gentle soul someone who is well-rounded and thoughtful and caring.

Luckily for us the lady took him into grade one and we could not have wished for more. His foundation was built. I always look to those days and cherish them. The teacher touched our son and also touched us and the world.

The following post has inspired me to write this article Welcome to the parenting jungle Some of the people who used to criticize or judge our son went on to have children but their kids seem to be worst than our son at the same age. It is easy to judge if you do not have kids but easy to be defensive when it comes to your kid. The same parents think their children are wonderful. Blind faith or blindfolded. My wife and I do not judge but know kids go through phases and what ever they do does not necessarily reflect their parent’s failures or strengths.

I suppose it takes a lot for them to discover who they are. A learning curve?

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5 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. kloppenmum
    Jan 23, 2011 @ 03:46:58

    I think the best thing that can happen to people who judge how we parent, is to have children themselves. I often wonder how the Super Nanny’s own children would turn out…if she had any.

    Reply

  2. gotojamesonblog
    Jan 23, 2011 @ 09:45:54

    Thats the point kloppenmum. The biggest mistake one can make is to judge children. Everyday they would be exploring themselves in different ways. They have lots of hidden talent that need to be discovered. On their journey to self discovery some of them can be misunderstood. Thanks for stopping by.

    Reply

  3. f chiganze
    Jan 25, 2011 @ 12:28:45

    mugoni wepwere ndea siyayo-well said

    Reply

  4. f chiganze
    Jan 25, 2011 @ 12:29:50

    mugoni wepwere ndea siyanayo-well said

    Reply

    • jameson goto
      Jan 25, 2011 @ 15:19:09

      Well said Fortune too. Our kids can be very different from us in many ways.. The same kids go through phases but there is always room for positive change. Thanks for stopping by.

      Reply

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